Meet Julia
MBE, BACP Acc, Psychotherapist
My professional qualifications let you know I have the training, experience and rigour to do this work. However, grief is personal, job titles are not. I would also like you to know what has motivated me for the last 33 years. As a psychotherapist, my focus has been on the many psychological problems sparked by loss. I've written books about grief, families and how to change.
My first counselling job was as a volunteer for Westminster Bereavement Service; when I would step into homes of people whose children had for instance, died in a car crash or their husbands had died of a heart attack. Although I felt daunted, inadequate and scared in the face of the anguish, I knew early on, that I had found the job for the rest of my life. I then went on to work in the drop-in centre of MIND.
This was followed by a more formal counselling training at Westminster Pastoral Foundation and I gained experience from another two years of volunteering. At the time I was Chairman of the fundraising arm of the charity Wellbeing (formerly Birthright), which opened my eyes to the devastation caused by infertility and the death of a baby.
It led me one sunny morning, persuading a board of Obstetric Consultants at St Mary’s Hospital, to take me on as their first counsellor; to support the families whose babies and children had died.
I worked there for the next twenty-three years. I learned from those families, that the response they received at the time of the death; how they were spoken to, the choices and information they were given, and how much time they had with their child before and after the death, all had a significant impact on how the grief progressed.
It inspired a determination in me to take that learning beyond my room in Paddington, out into the world. So with Jenni Thomas as Founder, I worked as Founder Patron to establish and launch Child Bereavement UK which is now the leading national charity that supports families and trains professionals when a child dies or when a child is bereaved. Until September 2019, Child Bereavement UK was the central focus of my work and my life, and after twenty-five years I made the decision to step down from my active role in the charity as a Trustee, although I remain a Founder Patron and keen supporter.
The more I have learnt the more I have realised what I don’t know, both practically and psychologically. I wanted to know what more could I offer. What more could we do psychologically? Why was that person behaving in such a way? And why would I say one thing, but hold back what I really wanted to say - how could I find a way of saying it all? Deeply listening to their response, what was going on in them, and how to broaden the lines of understanding and feel connected to that person.
This questioning has never left me, and has led me to do years of further training, like my Msc,. But also teaching; where I’ve loved the sharing of ideas, but most importantly, seeing the relief in people’s eyes when it dawns on them - they can do this death and dying thing, and the grief thing, this talking and feeling thing, it only requires the courage to dare.
Now I work in private practice, my work with clients will always be at the heart of what I do and who I am. It was from here that I wrote my first book: Grief Works followed by This Too Shall Pass and most recently ‘Every Family Has a Story. Writing the books was an intensely private process, finding words for the stories that lay deeply within me, to coherently describe what I had learned, which I hoped would be helpful to those reading them. The gift of my books, all, fortunately, Sunday Times bestsellers and published in over 30 territories, is that it took me out of my counselling room and into a more public facing place. I met my readers, other authors, therapists and have learnt so much.
From my first day as a Volunteer counsellor I didn’t set out with a fixed plan. I have followed by instinct and curiosity what ignites my energy and where I can connect to others. At the heart of all that I do, is a wish for connection to others. Ideally, a meaningful connection.
Where this led me in the last few years is the development of my Grief Works app which is a programme of active support. The app contains 28 sessions of grief-specific advice. It also offers a toolkit of practical resources to help manage grief. With the option of live 1-to-1 text chats with a bereavement counsellor too.
The project that is my other main focus, is the podcast I share with my daughters—Emily and Sophie -Therapy Works. Here, I invite guests into my therapy room, both known and unknown voices about some of life’s biggest challenges.
I hope you find what you are looking for on my website. I look forward to building and knowing you, my audience and responding to your needs.
Julia
Qualifications
Senior Accredited BACP Counsellor
UKCP Registered Psychotherapist
Master of Science in Person Centred Psychotherapy
Diploma Person Centred Counselling
Honorary Doctor of Middlesex University
Roles
1992-1995 Chairman Birthright Fundraising Committee
1992-2015 Counsellor for Paediatrics & Maternity St. Mary’s Hospital Paddington
1994+ Founder Patron Child Bereavement UK
1997-2008 Tutor Metanoia Institute
2001-2014 Honorary Fellow Imperial College
2003+ Devised & Ran Workshops for Women: Wisdom Within/What's Next/ Group Therapy
2008-2016 and 2017-2019 Trustee Child Bereavement UK
2009-2012 Advisory Council ACT
2013-2024 A Vice President of British Association Counselling & Psychotherapy
2020 Trustee The Prudence Trust
The Paradox of Grief | Julia Samuel | TEDxBath
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