Ways to support a loved one through a period of change

As I wrote in my book This Too Shall Pass: stories of change, crisis and hopeful beginnings, life is change.

None of us remain the same forever. All of us will go through major changes in our lives, both expected and unexpected, as will everyone we love.

If we remember just how challenging our major life changes were, we can connect with how challenging it must feel for our loved ones. Everyone we know will face challenges that will prompt growth and change, incrementally adapting  into different people over time. We can’t fight it, if we acknowledge  and honour this natural progression we can thrive.

Change is an integral part of life, and by supporting our loved ones through their transitions, we contribute to their personal growth and resilience. The by product being that our relationship grows too.

Here are some compassionate ways to support a loved one through a period of change—with the caveat that you won’t be able to offer this all of the time…inevitably there will be days and times you have to meet your needs, when  you feel low etc. Some of these suggestions can also be used as a source of insight or practical help for a friend or a work colleague going through a process of change.

1. Be Present and Listen - Often, the most valuable support we can offer is our presence and a listening ear. Allow your loved one to express their feelings and thoughts without interruption or judgment. Simply being there to listen can provide immense comfort. Active listening shows that you value their emotions and experiences, which can help them feel understood and less alone in their journey.
   ‍‍
2. Offer Practical Help - Practical assistance can make a significant difference. Offer to help with daily tasks such as cooking, cleaning, or running errands. These small acts can alleviate some of the stress and allow your loved one to focus on coping with the change. Sometimes, offering specific help—like walking their dog or picking up groceries—can be more effective than a general offer of assistance, as it shows you are attuned to their needs.
   ‍
3. Create a Safe and Supportive Environment - Create a safe and non-judgmental environment where your loved one can feel free to share their thoughts and feelings. Reassure them that it’s okay to feel vulnerable and that their emotions are valid. Let them know that you are there to support them, whatever they are going through. This support can help them process their emotions and begin to find their footing in a new reality.  Be honest when you don’t have the capacity, which is natural and inevitable.
   ‍‍
4. Encourage Self-Care and Healthy Habits - Change can be a long and difficult process. Be as patient and understanding as you can, offering  support even after the initial period of change. Regular check-ins can show your loved one that you care and are thinking of them. Even a simple message or call can brighten their day and remind them they are not alone. Consistent support can help them feel more secure as they navigate their journey.

Supporting a loved one through a period of change requires empathy, patience, understanding and endurance. By being present and offering practical and emotional support, you can help them navigate their journey and remind them that they are not alone.

Love,

Julia x